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Click here to download I Get Wet vinyl rip

Ok, so I might have spoken too quickly about classical music being the only way to get your pump on.  Andrew W.K.’s first album I Get Wet is the most unapologetic pie-in-the-face of guitar, drums, and synth ever pressed on vinyl.  The song titles are hokey…hell, three of the song titles have the word PARTY in them.  The lyrics are also hokey, his white shirt and white pants are hokey.  Any song could be mistaken for the next.  Yes, it has everything working toward a trip to the corners of Migraine and Geg Reflex Avenue.

But luckily it works because of one simple principle:  AWK might be the coolest dude on the face of the earth.  Not in the typical cool dude, Mick Jagger in his prime sense.  Nor is it the cool of a badass nonstop party dude that can’t be hampered by a brick-to-the-face bloody nose.  No, by literal definition he might be considered a pretty nerdy dude.  He learned the keyboard and guitar by hours spent in the basement because he didn’t have any friends to ride bikes with.

AWK is a cool dude because he’s just so damn get-up-and-go positive.  Usually super sunshine smiley people are just plain annoying.  Ya just wanna put them in a potato sack and smack em around with a pipe.  But somehow AWK avoids this with some sort of musty magic woven in his crusty white tees.  It’s something you have to experience in one of his shows.  They seem like they’re some sort of joke the entire time but it’s a side-splitter your favorite uncle tells and no matter how much you hear the stinker at Thanksgiving  it never gets old.

Since this album AWK has gone on to tame the entirety of Japan, tour as a motiviational speaker, and even has his own show on Cartoon Network called Destroy Build Destroy where his young contestants, well, Destroy stuff, Rebuild it, and Destroy it again.  Consider it all a miracle since there was a 99.9% chance that he was going to fade into obscurity after this album.

In 2002 everyone groaned about the death of rock music upon I Get Wet’s release.  “He’s watering down the proud tradition of our holy genre!” they said.  Music critics repeatedly punched themselves in the nards with each and every AWK high kick.  Austin, Texas was burnt to the ground by an angry AWK-hunting lynch mob.

It was all in vain.  Andrew just keeps on chuggin away with more and more ridiculously triumphant music and monster side projects.  God Bless you AWK.