Skip navigation

Monthly Archives: January 2010

#61: Porno Groove – The Sound of 70′s Adult Films Vinyl Download

Porno Groove 70's 70s Porn Soundtrack Download MP3 Vinyl Record CD Pornography Tape Beta Vintage Retro

Gently massage this link for a random Rebuilt Tranny post

Download link removed at the record label’s request, but you can purchase this album here!

This is a throwback selection of tracks from a hand-picked collection of 70′s porn flicks. The record label contests that this disc ”is  much more than your stereotypical ‘whacka-chicka’ music.” The record’s style does vary throughout the disc but continually embraces the lovers’ randy n’ dandy. It’llalso bring solo males to a state of maximum plumpage during their matinée viewing of equal parts deep penetration and moist pube lube.

The titles of these tracks and the movies in which they played in are simply hilarious:

SIDE A
01. Grateful Head (from “Jaynee’s Woodstock Adventure”)
02. In My El Camino (from “The Beaver Hunter”)
03. Gus On The Bus (from “The Traveling Salesman”)
04. Sweet Juices (from “Honeydew”)
05. Special Delivery (from “Lonely Mrs. Johnson”)

SIDE B
01. Dr. Mann’s Prescription (from “Insatiable”)
02. Do You Dance? (from “Right of Passage”)
03. O (from “The Story of Y”)
04. Carma’s Theme (from “Studio 69”)
05. Malibu High (from “Ride Me Like A Wave”)
06. Two Is Better Than One (from “Rosemary Cloney”)

I can’t imagine what it must have been like being a porn enthusiast back in the day. True aficionados were really dedicated to the cause because it wasn’t just a keyword, a click and presto: titties all up in your face . No, no, no these men had to make their way downtown or to the closest highway off ramp and visit a theatre built explicitly for X-rated films. In this theatre of sin they sat in crusty seats with a gang of other creeps and watched “The Beaver Hunter.” It was a team effort with plenty of side-glancing and glad-handing.

I wonder if the porno patrons would get popcorn for the movie. Just imagine how hard it would be to balance a tub of popcorn on your lap with one hand while you’re playing a furious game of pocket pool with the other. You’d spill it all over your lap, you’d have grease stains soaking your nice baby blue leisure suite…Jesus, how embarrassing. Well, if you split a bucket with a friend it wouldn’t be so bad. Just wedge that monster tub right between the outside of his and your thighs and really dig in as a pair. Only trouble is you’d have to match a lefty with a righty and that’s a whole other story right there.

God, what it must have smelled like in there. All those mustachioed, tinted-prescription glasses-wearing hombres workin’ up a deep sweat. Tricklin’ sweat all over that poorly ventilated theatre with a roof which most likely leaked just as bad as its patrons. Mildewed carpet, mildewed walls, mildewed man parts. Oh, the humanity.

Hopefully this video, sans music from the throbbin’ record, will get your mind off of the aroma of dewy man sack that’s being deepthroated by cheap polyester seat cushions.

#60: Chicago Underground Duo – In Praise of Shadows (2006) Vinyl Download

*download below*

I picked up this record solely because of the ridiculous lineup of instruments. Rob Mazurek uses the following: cornet, organ, celeste, piano, prepared piano, harpsichord, noise box, moogerfooger analog delay and ring modulator. The second half of the duo, Chad Taylor, plays drums, cymbals, mbira, gongs, percussion, vibraphone and prepared vibraphone. I had a look a couple of those up to make sure they weren’t trying to pull a fast one.

I wish my last name was Moogerfooger

Pouring such a complex array of sounds into an album increases the chance that said album will play with the musicality of a clothes dryer simultaneously fluffing a can of pea soup, a toddler and a string of Christmas lights. Chicago Underground Duo luckily avoids this trap and uses each instrument in perfect proportion. What they were able to achieve with such a well-stocked toolbox is seven uniquely alive tracks. Each has its own personality–it shakes your hand differently, tips differently and prepares its hash browns differently. You always want them to get cheese on that shit so you can steal a few bites but they never do, which really pisses you off but you turn the other cheek because they’re just so cool. That and they have a bitchin’ Cadillac they let you borrow while they’re on business trips.

Vibraphone: The rich man's xylophone.

Vibraphone: The rich man's xylophone.

I’d try to quantify or qualify how the dainty pluck of the mbira, or thumb piano, was really a step forward in Taylor’s artistic development but I’m not going to do that. The reason is that this is one of those albums that has the opportunity to mean completely different things to each listener. Each song has a distinct theme but this theme doesn’t box in the listener’s train of thought.This doesn’t mean they aren’t engaging; it just means that they enable you to unleash your inner most thoughts and ride them high in the friendly sky. It’s the magic carpet you can hop on while you’re soaking up the calming effects of a scented candle or smashing a  fat  ass  blunt.

Mbira: Traditional African instrument. So dainty.

Finally, I feel that it must be noted that John McEntire’s engineering on this album is fantastic. Every instrument is perfectly defined and represented with full voting privileges. I’ve never been one to buy a record based on who was working the knobs behind the scenes but I’m going to make an exception this time. He took an album that could have been good and made it great.

8)

Click here to download In Praise of Shadows to MP3 from vinyl

8)

Harpsichord: Black keys make everything cooler.

Harpsichord: Just look at those badass black keys.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.