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*vinyl download below*

If you take a look behind Mr. Triangular Turban, the one right there leaking digital flesh, you’ll notice the background resembles a Magic Eye poster. You remember, Magic Eye, the artwork you saw at mall kiosks during the 90′s. The first time you saw those curious technicolored splatters you didn’t really know what to make of them. The Kiosk Master sensed your bewilderment and explained, “Um they’re a hidden 3D picture, kind of. You sort of have to look through them or past them…or something. I think that one’s a dolphin jumping over a desert island. I think.” So you tried to stare through them. You also crossed your eyes, wiggled them, gouged them repeatedly because of your inability to see the hidden dolphin and his high-flying acrobatics.

Pleasures of the deep.

Then, just as you were about to kick the Kiosk Master in the nuts, the sea mammal and his sick air came into view. Oh, the beauty you beheld. Yes, it was just the outline of the dolphin and it wasn’t really the actual color of a dolphin and it gave you a terrible headache but it was AWESOME. It was like stepping into a whole ‘nother dimension where simply-shaped environments prevail  and taste accounts for nothing: A dimension called The Tri-County Mall Foodcourt. With this freeing feeling about your person you confidently worked down the gallery lineup. Pyramids at Giza, Statue of Liberty, Bald Eagle over Star-Spangled Banner, Confused Pug Puppy in Easter basket….each one outdoing its predecessor. It left you with terrifying anticipation. You thought, “If we’re making Magic Eyes now in ’93 there’s no telling what 3D beast we will unleash come 2k.”

Pleasures of the deepest.

… Well, 2000 only brought retinal tears and activated gag reflexes within the stereogram universe. Sorry.

*Side Note: This album is what would happen if The Moody Blues found themselves trapped in a Magic Eye poster. The scene would unfold as follows:

Narwhals, under the influence of Four Loko, would serve as the band’s transportation through a green-lightning sea. While navigating through a particularly spooky coral reef the fellows attempt to play “Tuesday Afternoon” to lift their spirits. However, just at that moment, the narwhals take a sharp dip into a grove of seafloor vents spewing Old Grand Dad Bourbon. “Tuesday Afternoon” Green-Ranger-morphs instantaneously into “Ambling Alp”.

The rest is history.

>>Click to download ODD BLOOD<<<<Get it while it’s hot.

Tracklist

A1 The Children
A2 Ambling Alp
A3 Madder Red
A4 I Remember
A5 O.N.E.
B1 Love Me Girl
B2 Rome
B3 Strange Reunions
B4 Mondegreen
B5 Grizelda

Remixes fantastique from the French getup Phoenix. I always anticipate their releases with great worry…always worrying they’re just one LP away from breaking my heart.

This is because I used to worry they were bitter that Cincinnati put a bad taste in their mouths after their performance at The Southgate House several years back. Because of this, I feared, they would only send us special Cincinnati Remixes with fart sounds replacing the vocals, similar to what Guster did with their album Keep It Together in 2003.

Back then Cincy was, even more so than  now, in this terrible hipster-concert-audience-funk where everyone would shift their weight to one leg, put their hands in their pockets and do their best Helen Keller impersonation. Phoenix kept doing their darndest to get the audience involved by addressing them directly in French accents, “Hello, this is our first time in Le Kentucky, we will play our guitars very best with strong hearts,” but the knit-capped, sleepy-eyed crowd weren’t having it. I don’t think I’ve ever been so embarassed by an anonymous rabble.

So, they’ll probably never come back. Cincy put on a poor performance but so far Phoenix hasn’t returned the favor. I’m seriously surprised they still send vinyl to this market. Maybe they saw me fainting over and over from audience-induced melancholy up in the balcony and took pity. Yeah, that must be it.

Click to Download Lisztomania Remixes

Tracks

A1 Lisztomania (Album Version) 4:02
A2 Lisztomania (Alex Metric Rmx) 5:05
B1 Lisztomania (Yuksek Rmx) 5:08
B2 Lisztomania (A Fight For Love / 25 Hours A Day Rmx) 5:42

*download below*

I’m really bad at paying attention to lyrics in songs. Most of the time I’ll get into a track just because I like the beat or its sound brings up a long-lost memory. But sometimes I’ll catch just a little snippet of the lyrics and think I know understand the song. Take, for example, the first song of this album: “Wop-A-Din-Din.” For the longest time I thought it was written about a sexy, exotic lover because of the first few verses:

She’s got big green eyes
And a long Egyptian face
She moves across the floor
At her own pace
When I’m here in bed
She’ll jump up on my chest
And when we lock eyes there’s so much love
I wanna cry

Wow, I thought, that’s a pretty intense. Big green eyes, long Egyptian face…this chick must be quite a looker. Yeah it’s a little weird that she jumps up on his chest but she’s probably just primed for some lovins. Those crazy kids.

And that’s how my perception stood for a long time until one day I just happened to catch the wording in the song’s next chunk and it left me scratching my head.

She comes in near
When I scratch under her ear
And she lifts her head
When I kiss around her neck

Won’t go to sleep
When she falls along my side
And two green eyes fade
To a porcelain marble white
And somehow when I sleep
She’ll end up at my feet
And if I roll and kick her out
I might knock her to the ground
But she’ll come back anyhow

Why is he scratching his lover behind the ear and making her sleep at his feet? The song took a total 180 and I actually felt pissed that he was treating her so crudely.

Then I looked over at my cat, Piano Little, as she took a stretch break from her 22 hour nap in a pile of laundry and it all became clear. The big green eyes, Egyptian face, jumping on his chest, scratching of the ear. This wasn’t some sultry Mediterranean fling. Wop-a-din-din is his kitty and I am a fool.

It was really quite obvious after taking n the time to listen to what’s right out in the open. After this I told myself I’d never listen to a song again without understanding its true meaning. And for a while I did listen to the lyrics and found that most of the songs that I liked now really bothered me. They were either too repetitive, too trite or too confusing. Sometimes I just don’t get things.

So I’m back to merely absorbing the tones of the human voice instead of comprehending the underlying message. Yes perhaps that makes me a philistine but maybe if I wanted to read a poem I’d go to the library. Asshole.

Click here to download Old Ramon

Click here for a random Rebuilt Tranny post

*download below*

Plant seeds of Devo, Talking Heads, Nintendo Entertainment System soundtracks, Dire Straights and the Beatles in a cabbage patch at the foot of Mt. Fuji. Fertilize heavily with synthesized voices and ensure exposure to plenty of electronic sunshine. Creepy Japanese mannequins will begin sprouting in 4 to 6 weeks. Harvest after 8 weeks and apply butter as desired.



Click here to download the USA Version of X Multiplies (Re-converted and Improved on 4/5/11)

Tracklist

A1 Nice Age 3:55
Electric Guitar – Kenji Ohmura*
Voice [Spoken Vocal] – Sandi*
Written-By – Chris Mosdell , Yukihiro Takahashi
A2 Behind The Mask 3:35
Written-By – Chris Mosdell , Ryuichi Sakamoto , Yukihiro Takahashi
A3 Rydeen 4:26
Written-By – Yukihiro Takahashi
A4 Day Tripper 2:39
Electric Guitar – Makoto Ayukawa
Written-By – John Lennon-Paul McCartney*
B1 Technopolis 4:15
Written-By – Ryuichi Sakamoto
B2 Multiplies 2:55
Written-By – Yellow Magic Orchestra
B3 Citizens Of Science 4:33
Backing Vocals – Sandi*
Electric Guitar – Kenji Ohmura*
Written-By – Chris Mosdell , Ryuichi Sakamoto
B4 Solid State Survior 3:55
Electric Guitar – Makoto Ayukawa
Written-By – Chris Mosdell , Yukihiro Takahashi

*download below*

Chris Frantz and Tina Weyworth of Talking Heads stole the show from David Byrne with this tasty little side project in 1981. It started out as a bit of fun for the married couple and evolved into a smash hit that outshined anything by Talking Heads, until Speaking in Tongues hit the scene in 1983. And that’s just what this album is, a whole Jello factory full of fun–it’ll make you wiggle and jiggle more than a Bill Cosby tickle ghost. This is a must have for anyone that loves carefree 80s synthpop, post-disco, or whatever you want to call it.  It really deserves a category to itself.  Maybe squigglegiggle. That sounds pleasurable.

Video for the single version of Genius of Love. The tempo is a tiny bit faster than the LP version.

Mariah Carey trippin’ the riff from Genius of Love

Movin’ and a shakin’ at 320 kbps just around the corner.

*Vinyl Re-Ripped and Updated 12/6/10*

I’m really excited to finally have the opportunity to share this online.

This album was one of the first I heard after the Miracle at Aural Canal–aka when I finally regained full hearing in my left after a mysterious year-long drought.

Anyway, I’ve had experience with Portishead in the past but always thought their tracks sounded a bit too much like Xanax-popping James Bond theme songs that are prevented from nodding off with repeated slaps by a cruel snare druminatrix.

However, Third completely broke out of this box. And thank the Lord Above.

This is what I envision when this disc drops and the lights dim.

I stand in a greyish-green, abandoned amusement park which lies dormant in the middle of rolling countryside.  Nothing fancy, no big rollercoasters or log flumes–just a lonely carousel, a spinning swing, and a popcorn cart sitting derelict upon the side of a cobblestoned walkway. A thick, greasy film covers everything. Countless years have passed since the park’s seen any people. Now, the only visitor is the constant, frigid wind. It’s silent, bleak, and ever-so-lonely.

Suddenly, everything in the park springs to life.  The carousel, with its faded pine fauna, begins to spin wildly.  The giant swing whirls with rusted chains entangled in a dangerous waltz.  It’s a terrible clash of sight and sound from which an ominous hum seeps. Sickly notes emerge in D Minor to give the  attractions newfound voices in a ghostly chorus.

There’s a tug on my leg.  At my feet stands a tiny doll with wooden hands, glass eyes and a paisley-printed dress. She grinds furiously to the throbbing sound.  The feeling to punt her like it’s fourth and thirty is quelled as she speaks in a shrill, hollow voice. “Hello, sir. It’s been ages since I’ve seen a strapping buck like you. Will you be my kissing friend?”

Her ruby lips look warm, very warm. And I oblige as she tugs my hand all the way to the crawl space under the carousel.

Kissing turns to necking.  Necking turns to petting. Petting turns to coitus. Coitus leads to baby. And of course a man and doll must marry once she’s with child. The Parish would be in an uproar if it were otherwise.

In a flash it’s 10 years later and I’ve fathered a litter of doll babies who’ve overrun the park and cater to my every need.  It’s not easy to keep the townsfolk at bay, with their pitchforks and torches and whatnot, but I’d do anything to protect my tinderbox family. They are so a tiny and their lips are so, so warm.

You are the softest Daddy I know!

What it boils down to is that this album creeps me the fuck out…in exactly the right way.

>>>Click here to download Third at 320 kbps from vinyl

The following video uses “Plastic” from this album.

Tracklist

A1 Silence 5:01
Cello – Charlotte Nicholls
Voice [Spoken Intro] – Claudio Campos
A2 Hunter 3:59
A3 Nylon Smile 3:20
B1 The Rip 4:31
Bassoon – Wendy Bertram
B2 Plastic 3:31
Clarinet – Team Brick
B3 We Carry On 6:28
C1 Deep Water 1:33
Vocals [Additional] – Ben Salisbury , David Poore , Somerfield Workers Choir, The , Team Brick
C2 Machine Gun 4:46
C3 Small 6:47
D1 Magic Doors 3:32
Electric Piano [Rhodes] – John Baggott
Hurdy Gurdy – Stu Barker
Saxophone – Will Gregory
D2 Threads 5:48
Bass – Jim Barr
Cello – Charlotte Nicholls
Drums – Clive Deamer
Guitar – Beth Gibbons
Saxophone – Will Gregory